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That includes Mills, a veteran television and film actor, whose only encounter with Alcala was when both of them appeared on "The Dating Game." "That's when I became part of a nightmare, and I didn't realize it was a nightmare until 32 years later," Mills said.

Alcala, who already had been convicted for the 1968 rape of an 8-year-old girl, was the first contestant to be introduced in the game-show episode. 1 is a successful photographer who got his start when his father found him in the dark room at the age of 13, fully developed," host Jim Lange said. "The best time is at night," Alcala answered with a wide smile. 2, said he had an almost immediate aversion to Alcala. If Alcala appeared likable to viewers at home, Mills said he was the complete opposite when they sat together in the show's green room, where the show's contestants waited before going on air. He was a standout creepy guy in my life." Within months of his "Dating Game" appearance, Alcala would become a killer, prosecutors said, abducting and murdering a 12-year-old girl in 1979.

He was a true "50-50" bi guy, a lover of men and women, not an “attention-seeker” or a "halfway-there gay man" or any of the ridiculous and offensive claims people make about bisexuals. This led to his heartache, since he was trying to date me, a gay guy who was not monogamously inclined (and still isn’t), a guy who was too immature to say, “Hey, I’m not really looking for a relationship.” This seems basic, but it's unfortunately still necessary to note in an ongoing effort to counteract this bizarre notion that someone who is attracted to multiple genders will inevitably miss having sex with people of the gender they’re not sleeping with, and cheat. For him, as well as for many others, his claim to bisexuality wasn’t a transitional phase or halfway point between straight and gay.

But even if a bisexual person does cheat, it's hardly evidence that bisexuality inclines a person toward infidelity. But I understand where this misconception comes from.

While progress is steady, America’s color lines don’t erase easy.

And since this week is Bisexual Awareness Week, and I’m feeling sentimental, I’m reflecting on the lessons that relationship taught me, and the ways I learned from him — because my ex-boyfriend was bisexual. The reality was far from it: He was unbearably monogamous and loyal to a fault.

At most, it's only evidence that the person cheated and is therefore not presently cut out for monogamous dating. Many gay guys (myself included) claim to be bisexual as a sort of "baby step" out of the closet.

We’re too scared to swing the door all the way open with a fabulous "We're here!

Even as an adult, it’s infuriating, depressing and demeaning all at once.

Socially, it causes us to defend and define our existence out of habit.

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